"I sat starring out the window of my den, which was my current cave. This was my first day of a sabbatical that felt forced upon me. I was exhausted and felt forsaken, trampled upon, and hopeless. Emotionally I was crushed and unable to think clearly about what had happened over the last several months. I had tried to keep it together but e very fiber of fight that I had was now lost, and I was giving up. One circumstance after another had crippled my very being. I felt battered where I worked, at my church, and in public. Panic attacks prohibited my ability to be in public, and my known world seemed to crumble before me as every aspect of my life was hit. That morning in my den, something broke inside of me. Since I was twenty-four, I had attended church, studied the Word, and been actively involved in almost every aspect of church life, and yet it was not enough."
I wrote this in my first book called Emerge. Today as I rewrite these words and recall those times, I am thankful that God showed me 'the more'. The more is never ending.
It is like a ladder to heaven that continues on and on, At the time of my questioning God, I was only looking at the church. Since then I began looking and expecting more from God to fulfill me. People, things, careers, or positions do not provide what we need. God knows and understands our every need - the desires of our hearts.
When I stepped out of man's rules, regulations, false pretense, and restrictions, I began soaring with God. The Holy Spirit began showing me things I never imagined in the natural realm. With a heart open to all the things of God, I began climbing the ladder of what God had purposed for me. Each step has taken me into new levels of intimacy. I love this new definition of Christianity.
I want to encourage you to not settle for less. God has a specific purpose and plan for your life with divine intentions to set your feet higher. Isaiah 40:31 says 'He gives strength to the faint and strengthens the powerless...but those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not become weary, they will walk and not faint'.
So start climbing! I love my journey now and I can truly say 'the Lord is my strength'. Make that your message as well and reach for that new level God has for you.